Don't Drink The Water!

Filed under Drinking Water Adventures in the Frump House:

Recently, after a long, hot day of 90+ degree weather, my husband asked our older son to get him a glass of ice water.

Jericho dutifully pulled a large glass out of the cupboard, dispensed some ice, then water, and brought it to his dad.

About a half hour later, after sipping the water while watching a movie with the kids, Jeff suddenly made a gagging-wretching noise. "E-gaack...YUCK!"

We all turned from what we were doing, and saw him holding his cup aloft and inspecting the contents in the bottom of his glass.

"There's CORN in my ice water!" he gasped in total disgust.

And we all just laughed.

Because, well, we're kinda corny that way. Not with our water, mind you, but our sense of humor.

Turns out a few kernels of corn escaped the confines of a bag in the freezer door just above the ice chute, and hid out waiting for dad's glass before making their escape, lol.

It could have been worse, though.

Like the last time mystery floaties began appearing in our ice water.

When it happened to me, I immediately investigated.

I unwrapped a mangled ziploc bag which had somehow gotten twisted around the corkscrew thing that pushes ice out the dispenser chute. It had torn open, dispersing unappetizing chunks of leftover pepperoni pizza into our water. Blech.

:: :: :: ::

However, that doesn't even begin to describe the grossness that Jeff discovered teaching his first day of summer school.

Jeff always takes in a couple large bottles of water with him to school, as the water fountains there are always tepid and the water tastes disgusting.

One of his usual water bottles was in the dishwasher, so he slipped into the bedroom and took the one he had on his nightstand.

This particular bottle was, in a previous life, a 2 quart milk bottle from a local dairy. He likes this particular one because we have a tight-fitting plastic lid that came with it, and the opening is large enough to accomodate ice cubes, and doesn't have the icky plastic taste that most water bottles do after a while.

In a bit of a hurry, and noticing that it was already half-full of water, he just grabbed out a handful of ice and pushed the cubes down inside.

Later, after talking at length to his students and working up quite a thirst, Jeff sat down at his desk to enjoy some ice water while they took a quiz.

As he's guzzling down the water, he suddenly feels the most disgusting thing plop into his mouth.

Are you ready for this?

I'm warning you...it's gross.

If you have food, I'd advise swallowing or putting whatever you have down.

It was a cotton ball.

A used cotton ball.

One that had been soaked in rubbing alcohol and used to clean off a pretty good scrape on Judah's knee.

Which Judah later found dried up in the wastebasket in my bathroom...and for some odd reason decided to take it all the way into the bedroom and rehydrate it in daddy's water bottle.

Ack!

After all, what else is a toddler to do with his newfound knowledge gleaned from playing with these?