The Long Q & A About Tuna

You know how there comes a day when it's like a faucet is turned on and three year olds suddenly begin asking "Why?" about everything?

It seems that their inquiring little minds are always at work categorizing and trying to make sense out of stuff they see at work in the world around them.

When you have a son like Judah, and then babysit two equally curious little girls every weekday, all of which are 3 and under, you can imagine the inordinate amounts of questions I get. Starved for adult conversation Gazillions of questions.

It can be kind of exhausting to have those brain picking sessions conversations with so many little kids all at once, because your mind has to race ahead trying to put the puzzle together for them, and usually they're all coming from a different point.

The other day was just such a day.

Judah came up to me in the kitchen with a can of tuna he'd snagged from the cupboard beneath the breakfast bar earlier in the day.

"What is dis, mama?"

"Fish," I replied absently, mixing up a batch of muffins.


"Fish?" he asked in surprise, squinching up his little nose.


"Yep. It's tuna, a type of fish."

Unconvinced, he asked, "Why does it have da daw-phin on it?"


"Oh, that's to tell us that no dolphins were harmed when they caught the fish in the big nets out in the ocean."


Looking carefully at the can again, he asked, "Is dere daw-phins in it?"

"Nope, no dolphins."

"Well, what's in it?"


"Fish," I replied again as I opened the hot oven and pulled an octo-mom, trying to keep all three of the kids from getting too close while getting the pan off the couner and situated in the oven.

I caught a puzzled expression on his face and added a tad impatiently, "Food. It's food. To eat."

"Fish food?"

That old comedic bit Who's on first? suddenly sprang to mind. "Well, yes. It is fish...and it's food."

"Da fish food for da daw-phins?" I suppose right about then he was remembering a TV show we'd seen that involved a trained dolphin being fed some fish.


"Nope. It's food for us."

"We eat da fishies?" he asked, looking astounded.

Suddenly I got that feeling.

You know, the one that parents feel when their kids first find out the truth about Santa? Except this was it's close cousin...the one you get the first time that your kids realize tuna comes from fish, beef comes from cows and chicken comes from, well, chickens.

I assumed that we were going to be in for a real ordeal over eating fish thereafter, because that kids flick about Nemo is one of his favorites. In fact, he'd been playing with his Nemo stuffed toy maybe a half hour earlier.

I knew I must act swiftly to distract him from developing an aversion to fish, "Yes" I replied enthusiastically. "Fish is very good for us. It's yummy, too." I felt compelled to pull out the big guns. "Daddy LOVES fish."


"Oh." That seemed to answer everything for him. "Can you make us some fish food?"

Because I'd already had chicken cooking in the crock pot and lunch was already over, I told him we'd have to do it another day.

Well, he wouldn't let it die.

The next morning, he spotted the can in the still doorless cupboard, and began to pester me anew to make him and his little friends "fish food".

He was ridiculously excited about it when I finally broke down and made an afternoon snack for them out of it. An old standby from childhood...macaroni & cheese with tuna mixed in.

He ran to tell his little friend Miss R that they were going to get to have fish food, and together they happy-danced around the living room, rejoicing over the prospect.

For some strange reason, they'd been lugging cans of tuna all over the house the past couple of days, and odd little snatches of their conversations during their play revealed their curiosity as to te mysterious contents of the cans.

So I made a big show of opening and draining a can of tuna and showing them the flaky fish inside as I unceremoniously dumped it into the Mac & Cheese.

After asking the blessing, they dug in, and the moment after he'd tasted of this delicacy, he announced, "Dis isn't fish food, mama...it's chicken!"

Oh, my poor, poor child. He must be soooo confused. Dolphins on a can of fish that tastes like chicken.


All I can say is that I'm glad we didn't have the brand of tuna with the mermaid on the front of the can or I'd have really had some 'splainin to do...because little Miss R is a huge fan of that little red-headed singing mermaid Ariel.

Calgon, take me away.